Life in review on this somewhat sunshiny Sunday afternoon. Life continues to be topsy turvy wavy splishy splashy. 27 looms disgustingly close and there are days when I look at where I am and I feel like crying. Sometimes in joy sometimes in frustration. Learning to adapt to my new family and what it means to be the parent of 3 children instead of 1. This constant being sick has not helped, I feel helpless. Between dealing with ex wives/husbands (ok not ex's still need those damn divorces, curses they are so expensive), attitudes and growing pains, financial woes, health issues, and this damn economic depression, it leaves one feeling like running away. I just need something and I can't name it or describe it.
Family dynamics have changed considerably both in my own and in my new. I have so many desires and wants and sometimes I feel I have to reconcile the fact that it doesn't fit into my new reality. I feel as if there is a cloud hovering above my head, perhaps thats the cold medicine in my system and continously aching chest, so I know my health needs to tackled and hard. And ABOVE all else, my partner's health and if I can motivate and carry through with my own regimen, then nagging him into it again will be less like nagging, I suppose.
I keep juggling the notion of "small changes" vs "radical makeover" and perhaps it will do me good both physically and mentally to stick to something so rigorous. Perhaps it will empower me to examine more whats going on with me and find some peace.
Tomorrow will be juices and smoothies only.
My journey into health and education and discovering a vegan/raw lifestyle as a family.
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